Ink and Keys (1) by Flo

I sit (2) staring at the pile of gifts on the table. Standing out like a cardinal amongst crows (3) is that small package with the letter attached to it. On it the unmistakable messy handwriting of Fred, my now dead brother (4).

I sneak a glance at my Mom. She is just as shaken as I am, if not more. With trembling hands I reach for it; it says.

Hey Kat(5),

Happy birthday Sis, I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to say this in person but I’m guessing that by the time you read this I’ll be dead, I say guess because it is never a good thing to assume one’s death because of self-fulfilling prophesies and stuff, (6) well anyway if I am dead it would be hard to say Happy Birthday (7) from the beyond, where ever that is I’m pretty sure they don’t make long distance calls. (8)

1.   The title of this vignette closely resembles those of Cisneros’. While the title does play a part in the story it is not the main theme. Just like with Cisneros’ chapter called Hairs my story’s title tells a little about the surface story however it does not tell much about the story underneath the story. In this case Ink and keys are the gifts that Kat receives from her brother a letter and a key. However the story talks about the hardships of growing up and the hardships of change. Cisneros’ title Hairs reflects the fact that Esperanza talks about the different hairs that exist in her family however the story really talks about safety. In this way my title resembles hers because neither give away the true substance however they both give a taste of what the story is about.

2.   I sit here the story resembles Cisneros’ style of writing. This is because Cisneros always talks in first person unless she is describing someone from another person’s eyes. She also always talks in present tens. Thus by saying “I sit” I am able to demonstrate that the scenarios are similar. Talking in first person and in present tense Cisneros is able to communicate more effectively the feelings of her characters to the reader. In this story I try and do the same.

3.   By using this uncommon metaphor I once again copy Cisneros’ style. She often uses metaphors however she does not often use well known metaphors. A metaphor used by Cisneros is that of the Four Skinny Trees. Cisneros uses four skinny trees to describe Esperanza and her friends. This uncommon metaphor is perfect because it gives us a clear idea of what she is trying to describe. In the same way by saying “it stood out like a cardinal among crows” you can also see how clearly the package stood out without having to resort to overused metaphors.

4.   This grammar mistake is also part of Cisneros’ typically style. All trough out her work she uses fragments. Whether they are simple things like saying “Louie’s family.” Or more complex fragments like “and broke both arms.” Fragments are always there. In this case the fragment helps explain where the letter comes from without going into a big explanation about it. It also helps give a bit of background info without actually telling about the girls past.

5.   Here for the first time we find out that the protagonist of the story is a girl. Because the girl previously mentions her mother we can guess that she is at least still in her teens. This is very much like Cisneros’ style. In her stories she often uses women as the protagonists, more often still she uses teenage girls. Her stories are often about growing up and facing difficulties in life, and it is usually difficulties that a girl has to deal with. So by making the protagonist a girl the story is resembling her choice in characters.

6.   Here the story is written in the same way we speak. It rambles a little and it also tends to diverse from the topic at hand. Writing in the same way people speak is a technique Cisneros uses. This helps make the writing more simple however often the meaning behind the words is more complicated then it seems. In this case it talks about the beyond knowing that he was going to die and questioning whether out lives are controlled by destiny or not. This can be gathered from the casual way Fred speaks of his death. An example of this is when Cisneros says “See. That’s what I mean. No wonder everybody gave up…” in the chapter titled There was an Old Woman She Had So Many Children She Didn’t Know What to Do. Cisneros writes literarily as if Esperanza was speaking to someone.

7.   Here the random use of capitalization is also an imitation of Cisneros’ style. Cisneros uses random capitalization to emphasize certain points even more. This helps her give importance to things that might otherwise be overlooked. An example of this is when she capitalizes the word you’re in the chapter titled Alicia Who Sees Mice. In this case Happy Birthday is capitalized to show how much Fred cares about his sister’s birthday. While this is one of the less used techniques of Cisneros it is part of her style.

8.   Here there is a mixture of two techniques. The first is the most obvious one the run-on sentence. Cisneros often uses run-ons to show the connection of ideas. In the same way here the run-ons are used to show the connection of ideas between thoughts that while similar they could be separate sentences. An example of this is the second paragraph in Hairs Cisneros’ uses a single sentence as a paragraph to show the connection about thoughts on her mother’s hair. The second technique is that of writing in the same way that people speak. As explained in #6 this style is used by Cisneros to suggest simplicity when a bigger subject is behind the words.

I look inside the and find a choker that has an old and beautiful key on it, Fred had always wore it around his neck.

Well yeah, that’s my key remember it? I hope you do.

Do you remember how one day when you were 5 you asked me what it opened? Do you remember what I said Kat? Do you? (10)I told you it opened every door in the world but it belonged to none (11).

It’s been ten years Kat, have you figured it out yet? Do you know what I meant? I sure hope you do.

In case you haven’t here is a clue. That keys help us open doors. Remember it is not enough to open a door you must also cross it. Well sister dear I hope that helps.

Oh and Kat baby doll(13) don’t be too sad about my death, mind you I don’t want you celebrating me being gone or anything, but don’t weep over me too much. Oh and one last thing help mom out, be kind.(14)

That is all Sister dear,

10.                 The style imitated here is that of parallelism. Just like in Alice Who Sees Mice the sentences in this part of the story start in the same way. This is used to suggest connection as well as to give the writing more flow. Repetition is also somewhat of a factor here this helps give the piece a more defined rhythm. This is very much like Cisneros’ style because she often uses parallelism to connect ideas.

11.                 Once again here the use of metaphors is evident. Metaphors here are used to hint at the idea that there is more to the meaning of the words then what they really appear to be saying. Metaphors and similes are often used by Cisneros it gives the work a nice flow and it helps paint images better then simple words do.

12.                 Here the “iceberg style” is used. While words say one thing they mean another. This is similar to Cisneros yet it is also different in her work she never openly tells people that words mean more then they do however here Fred is trying to help his sister solve a puzzle. While they are different both use simple words to express powerful meanings. In the case of my story Fred is trying to tell his sister that people that love her will always be there to help her through things but that she has to also work to get things and not expect them to be served on a silver platter. An example of when Cisneros uses this technique is in the chapter titled Those Who Don’t when Cisneros writes “All brown all around, we are safe.” While on the surface level she is talking about the appearance of people on a deeper level she is referring to change and how without it people feel safe.

13.                 When Fred writes Kat baby doll it is a way to show emotions through words. While Cisneros never bluntly states many facts many of her words and the words of her characters help us deduce what is going on. Fred never says I love you he doesn’t even say you mean a lot to me, however simple gestures like calling Kat a baby doll or calling her sister dear, show that he cares about her and that he really does love his sister. An example of when Cisneros uses this is in the chapter called A Smart Cookie, Cisneros never sais that Esperanza’s mom regrets her rash decision, she also never sais that Esperanza’s mom is afraid that Esperanza will turn out like her but by the clues she gives we can deduce those things about Esperanza’s mom.

A single tear roles down my cheek, onto my smiling lips.(15) I try to put the choker on. My hands are trembling too much.(16)

Do you want some help? Mom asked(17)

I just nodded; the choker is on. I speak softly for the first time in almost a month (18) and say, thanks Mom, for everything (19).

15. Here once again we are able to see the power of writing in first person n present tense. Cisneros often uses this style in order to emphasis emotions. Writing in first person as the events happen help the reader connect to the character’s emotions. It helps them see what they are supposed to see and it helps them feel what they are supposed to feel. In this case they can feel the bittersweet, feeling of sorrow and happiness that the letter has left within Kat. An example of when Cisneros uses this is the chapter called Sire in that chapter the first person really helps transmit Esperanza’s emotions.

16.                 Here the use of simple and short sentences that mean a lot while saying little is typical of Cisneros. While the sentences could easily be joined to make a single more complex sentence they are left in a simple form. Once again the perfect example for this is presented in A Smart Cookie. When Cisneros writes “Shame is a bad thing, you know. It keeps you down.” In that way she uses simple sentences to explain a powerful emotion.

17. The misuse of dialogue is also very typical of Cisneros. Throughout the entire book she has not once written with the correct form of dialogue. This helps connect thoughts to words, description to thoughts, and characters to descriptions. By misusing this form of grammar it prevents the dialogue from taking away from what is really important in that part of the story.

18. This small and discreet hint helps the reader grasp the real theme of the story. In this case growing up and dealing with the difficulties of life. By saying that Kat has not spoken in almost a month the reader is able to deduce that Kat has not been dealing with her brother’s death well and by her breaking this silence spell it shows that she is finally getting over this difficulty in her life. Cisneros often uses this n her writing to help convey what really happened without directly stating it. An example of this is the chapter titled Red Clowns.

19. Once again these words hold a hidden message. Not only is Cisneros love for misusing grammar in dialogue evident in this case we are also able to see that there are more emotions put into those four words then into perhaps the rest of the story. Once again simple words are used to convey a powerful message in this case, a mother’s unconditional love helps.

20. Here the main character shows the resolution of the story. In many chapters Cisneros has used this technique. It helps the reader reach the conclusion that she wants them to reach without telling them this is so. <by allowing the character to formulate an ending or a decision she is able to conclude her story simply conveying her message effectively through the thoughts of her character. An example of this is the ending chapter of the book titled Mango Says Goodbye Sometimes.